Portside Parlour

Portside Parlour | A Bar. In A Toilet.

Bad news. Unfortunately Portside Parlour has now closed. Which adds a little bathos to this archived article…

The good news…

Portside Parlour – East London’s very first underground rum cocktail bar – is open. NOPE.

The better news…

It’s sexier and more speakeasy-like than we initially thought.

You’ll lead your date down a creaking wooden staircase, and straight into a toilet. Which, as you well know, is how all of the best dates begin. However on entering the toilet you’ll throw your first (and possibly last) curve ball, by pulling the old-fashioned loo chain next to the towel rail, which will instantaneously –

1. Unveil the hidden bar,

2. Delight your date, and

3. Require you to high five yourself and whisper “I rule”.

The even better news…

When the wall swings open you’ll find a low-ceilinged, candlelit basement stuffed with red leather sofas, guilt mirrors, rickety tables and chests; old books, oil lamps and a waving cat.

And there – to a soundtrack of rock n’ roll and dirty blues – you’ll uncover some of London’s best bartenders serving up a selection of rum-based concoctions in pewter tankards and crystal glasses alongside shareable “winter warmers” like Hot Buttered Rum.

The bad news…

There is no bad news.

NOTE: The bad news actually is that this bar has now closed. Sorry.