Dirty Burger

Dirty Burger | Balham Restaurant

You and Jessica Ennis have a lot in common.

Aside from the most obvious similarities – a great smile and a killer six pack –  you’ve also both dedicated your lives to nobly seeking out perfection.

Jessica’s spent years striving to become the ultimate heptathlete, while you – in a comparable demonstration of grit and determination – have spent only marginally less time trying to uncover London’s greatest burger.

As a discerning judge of London’s best, you’ve spent months nipping between MEATliquor, Honest Burgers, Hawksmoor, Lucky Chip, Patty & Bun and beyond, critically assessing burger/bun ratios and textures; the smokiness of bacon; the gooeyness of cheese; the structural integrity of each meal and – most pertinently of all – the number of times you’ve let out an audible moan while eating.

And now the time has come to stretch the boundaries of your training and expertise, with a trip to Dirty Burger.

Dirty Burger

Have no doubt: others will superficially visit this place in the hope that eating in a timber-walled sleeve of a 50s style diner might be fun.

And it will be.

But you – the Jessica Ennis of burger connoisseurs – will be there with a far loftier purpose, expertly tucking into your milkshake and signature Dirty Burger in a glorious race to uncover perfection.

You deserve a medal for commitment alone.


NOTE: Dirty Burger is open 12-11pm weekdays, and 10am-11pm on weekends. It’s walk-in only: just turn up.

Dirty Burger | 7A Chestnut Grove, Balham, London SW12 8JA

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Dirty Burger

7A Chestnut Grove, Balham, SW12 8JA
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